I've been a FOB fan since Junior High.
I was a very naive and sheltered girl when I was little and up until 7th or 8th grade, I hadn't listened to any "modern", "popular" bands of the day. I was a pure 80's-and-whatever-my-parents-listened-to in terms of music. Then, at a friends house, I heard All American Rejects for the first time. I kinda felt wrong listening to it. (What is this "rock-and-roll" loud music we are listening to? i think i like it.) I know. I'm an 80 year old Nun-don't judge. Then they played "Paper Heart" at a church dance and I realized the beauty that is Modern Pop music. AAR will forever be my first and I will always love them.
Fast forward a bit. Remember Instant Messaging? Before everyone had a phone with unlimited Texting? It was the coolest and cruelest thing I can remember. It was the beginning of people thinking they could say ANYTHING they wanted because you weren't face-to-face with someone. I shed a lot of tears because of what people said on IM...but that's another story... Remember how you could write a little blurb at the top of your IM box that basically said "ask me about this cool ambiguous sentence-i'm-so-cool"...well a few of my friends had the weirdest blurbs, so I asked them what they meant. "Oh! They're song lyrics! It's this awesome band called Fall Out Boy..."
So I looked them up. I listened to a song. My ears buzzed and my heart sang. I couldn't get the smile off my face. This Modern Pop/Rock stuff was pretty darn awesome!
My girl friend burned me a mixed-cd (which was also pretty awesome) with all the FOB songs her brother had. Addicted.
I found out FOB was playing a concert at UVU (which was still UVSC then). I had never been to a concert before. I had to be there. I hesitantly told my parents that the only thing I wanted for my 16th birthday was a ticket to this concert. I never thought they would actually get it, but I had to try!
Fast forward to my 16th birthday. I was handed an envelope. Inside > 2 tickets to the FOB concert in Orem! I thought I was in a dream. Life could not get any better! And then I looked at the ticket again. "Fall Out Boy" opened by "All American Rejects"...WHAT?! This was like heaven in a ticket. I. could. not. believe. it.
At school I told my "friends" about the concert and how excited I was. & I got so much crap. Inside my naive little girl was whispering 'what? i thought this was cool to go to concerts'...."They're such sell-outs," my guy friends would say. I had never had guy friends before-so what they said made an impression on me and made me feel really stupid.
(side note: wouldn't "selling-out" a concert be a good thing? don't you want people to come? i've never understood that term....anyway...)
This is the point in my life where, looking back, I see myself making the first decisions to choose who I was going to be in my life. Was I going to be the wishy-washy girl that agreed with her "friends" just to belong, or was I going to do things that made me happy, regardless of what people thought?
I'm proud to say I believe I made the right choice. Looking back now, I wonder why I was ever friends with them...but that is also another story. ;)
I invited my friend Adriana that was part of another group that I didn't think I belonged-but she was really nice to me and I liked spending time with her and she didn't make fun of me for what bands I listened to.
We went to the concert and I drank it all in. I danced and sang and laughed and had a fantastic time. It will be something that I always remember.
As time has gone by, I have changed (a lot) from that person I was at 16. I realized the pedestal I had put all boys on is actually below sea level. There are only a few that are strong enough to climb out and join me on land. Not that I'm saying I'm so high above people--I just realized that boys-i-thought-could-do-no-wrong are actually human too, and I choose to be around the ones that actually make me feel good about myself.
I realized that music can be really great for your soul, or really bad for it and that it's worth experimenting to find the stuff that makes you happy.
Through it all, I have never stopped loving Fall Out Boy. Maybe it's a silly thing, but I see it as a metaphor-if I would have listened to my "friends" and stopped listening to FOB (aka stopped doing things I loved), then I would not be the person I am today. I have worked really hard to become this girl, and I am proud of ME.
When I was 17, I was working at an Ice Cream shop in the mall and I met some of the nicest boys I've ever met. They were a year older than me, they were part of the "dangerous" crowd. I knew they smoked and drank and partied, but when I was with them-they were so respectful and kind to me. Another lesson I learned > just because someone is a church-goer doesn't mean they are Christ-like and visa versa.
Anyway, one of them knew I loved FOB and he liked them too. So one day (after he no longer worked at the shop btw) he texted me and told me they had finally come out with another album! I was so excited and couldn't wait to hear it. Then, to my surprise-he came to the shop and handed me a CD burned with their music. (That was probably illegal...oops.) It was the sweetest thing anyone had done for me because I knew he liked me for me and not for what was popular. I popped in the CD and we sat there soaking in the beat. Heaven.
Listening to their new CD this morning on the way to work, all these memories came back to me. Some of them painful, but I really realized how far I've come since then. I'm grateful for the choices I made, the people I stayed friends with, and the ones I kicked to the curb.
I'm not afraid to like what I like. I'm proud to be the person I am. I don't hide it anymore. and guess what? I still have friends. Real friends. Ones that care for and love me NO MATTER WHAT. I love you for that. Thank you for being my friend-whether you like Fall Out Boy or not. ;)
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