daydreams

Some days I find myself daydreaming about my future life.

Full of smiles, laughter, hand squeezing, traveling, making old things beautiful, red telephone booths, fashion, kisses, boardwalks, sunsets, beaches, sandy toes, rainbows, happiness. 

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I KNOW life is never as perfect as these moments captured on camera, but I will ALWAYS hold on to that belief that  there ARE some perfect MOMENTS in life and I will ALWAYS be searching for them.

I KNOW marriage is hard. I KNOW having a family is hard. I KNOW being a wife and mom will be REALLY hard. But I've learned my whole life that I CAN DO HARD THINGS. and my life has been so much richer because of the hard things I've done.

The important part is to keep a good attitude, stay close to God, and choose a man that loves me and knows how to go through hard things too. 

Sometimes my heart aches so much for a boyfriend, for a husband, for a family. Sometimes I get a little angry because it's a GOOD goal for me to have, so why won't God help me achieve it?

why? because. . .

His is.

He has a plan for me.

He KNOWS me more than I know myself. He knows my future husband. He knows what we need to learn before we meet each other.

But it WILL happen. I have faith that there IS someone "out there" for me.

Whenever I start talking about this I know that some people will say:

"This is the BEST time in your life--enjoy it now before it's gone forever."

"I WISH I was back in your shoes!"

"Don't get married/don't have kids--it's over rated/it's HARD!"

"Well, if you really want to get married so bad, then go to the Singles Ward--that's the 

only way to meet people."

I understand where you're coming from. I know I'm a little naive. But I also know I'm not stupid. I know a LOT of people/Mormons meet their spouse in a Singles Ward--and that's GREAT! I also do not believe that is the ONLY way to meet people. I know that I will go through some really hard things in my future. I know it will not be a fairy tale every second of every day. But I also know that It's important. I know that I have done lots of hard things in my life and I know how to work through them. I know Heavenly Father will be with me every step of the way. 

I ALSO know enough not to waste my life away. This IS a GREAT time in life! I AM enjoying it! I will NOT throw it away. I am happy and proud to be a successful single 20-something living in Utah County. I don't feel sorry for myself at ALL! In fact, I really like my life right now!

I'm just saying, that sometimes life would be fun to share with someone. Yes, I have my family and yes, I share a lot with my mom and she is very good at feeling happy for me. . .but a boyfriend, a husband who is fully committed to my life; someone to call up and say "hey, wanna go get a cookie at Subway?"--whenever, someone that I can be fully committed to also. . .THAT sounds really nice.

It will come.

For now, I'll keep enjoying my life!

But I will never stop daydreaming. ever.